Nothing is as it seems,
in this world,
of sights and sounds,
wisdom is hard to come by,
but ignorance, my friend,
in one way or another,
are we all,
"he who thinks himself wise,
O heavens! is a great fool."
Voltaire was right indeed,
though not in deed perhaps.


Greetings from a land out of your reach,
my purpose here is not to teach,
but to share the customs of my land,
to draw a line into the sand,
I wish you well,
and perhaps in time,
you will understand my land,
that is to say,
my mind.
they are both the same,
yet totally different and opposed.
To know one is to know the other,
and never know yourself.

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--When you've read every other blog
Thursday, March 09, 2006  
This one's for you Erin

So, I'm co-oping at Diversified Technology...

I never thought I would spend so much time at work not doing work. I have read so many penny arcade comics... I started back at the first comic a few days ago. I figure I can get current by the end of my co-op session. I wish i had some hardware to fool with. I'm supposed to be looking for system and network performance monitoring software that can log to an SQL database. I also need a php webpage to access the database and display the data in a bargraph. I need to be able to graph the data for several different computers on the same graph to be able to visually compare the data. blah blah blah. Its interesting but so very boring.

torpid tyrant

7:40 PM

(6) comments
Sunday, November 07, 2004  
Haven't tried my hand at poetry in a while. I need some input on this one. But youve got to be familiar with Alice's Adventures in Wonderland.

***A Third Dream, in short***
--"Welcome back to Wonderland,"
said Rabbit to the child,
"Nice to see you once again;
its certainly been a while."
--"Thank you very much dear sir, but note
I've grown a bit since last we spoke."
--"I marked that change as you approached
But neither bull nor speeding coach
can wrench your childishness from here.
The remenants of your early years
will never disappear."
--"I am not sure 'tis good or ill th-"
but a butterfly flew through the field
and Alice, distracted, stared and asked,
"Have you, dear sir, changed form at last?"
--"Why hello my dear, I confess that you were right.
I changed to this like day to night.
Surprised was I, and happily so,
to find that hookah smoke, though grand,
is inferior to flight
zooming from To to Fro"
--"But sir you seem less introspective
in your current form.
Do you miss your former state?
When were you reborn?"
--"Slow down my dear, it matters not.
I am as I will be.
As I was, I was I,
and that I'll always be.
More important here is you.
--You've not noticed the obvious change
taken place since your last sojourn.
Wonderland has lost its edge.
Conformed to what you've 'learned.'
--Since the Red King awoke
and since you left us in the lurch
and with no other primise than your own,
your unconscious was our church.
--I must say your common sense,
though consistent and undefeated,
is quite a few
rungs below
the climate that we needed.
--Your world is fine within itself,
for there it all makes sense.
But here my dear nonsense makes sense
and sense just makes no sense."
--"I feel so dreadful.
What I've done,
unconscious though it be,
has ruined the place I've called my home
though no one knows but me.
--What should I do?
Should I leave now,
never to come back?"
--"Why not at all my dear!
Calm down.
Breath deep.

--All that you must do, sweet child
is provide some sort of fix.

--Take this bottle (Rabbit's finest brew).
Apply it to the Red King's drink
and watch him start to swoon.
His dreams will quite suffice.
Do not take it personally though
I don't mean your thoughts weren't nice."
--"Wait a moment please.
Mr. Cater- I mean Butterfly
was the King the source of Wonderland
I thought the source was I.
I'll happily perform the service you require
but tell me first who's mental coals
started this wonderous fire."
--"Nothing's as simple as that 'round here
that you know to0 well.
We had two origins or more
that way life's bet was hedged.
--As you've learned two heads are better than one,
and two heads on single shoulders well,
that is quite ideal.
There is no better way to find
meaning in such madnesses as these
than putting several points of view
see which one will last
then pick them both
for both are fairly fair.
Don't worry which came first or last.
Just be glad they are both there."
--"Fair thee well Sir Butterfly
I go as you request;
wish me luck as I do you.
May you only have the best.
--I suppose that once 'tis done
I'll go back from whence I came,
but please at least remember me
and don't forget my name."
--"You worry for nothing, Alice dear.
We cannot forget
that you were here is very clear
the very landscape is evidence
of your fingerprint.
--The act of your existence here
is enough to effect a change.
And you are more an influence
than ever could be explained.
--Suffice it to say you create worlds
wherever you do walk.
No place is quite the same as was
before you left your mark.
--Know that you are known to be
not otherwise than you would seem
to wish yourself to seem to be.
I wish you safest passage
back to 'reality'."

~torpid tyrant

2:52 AM

(3) comments
Thursday, November 04, 2004  
A few things to think about:

"Cheshire-Puss," she began, rather timidly, as she did not at all know whether it would like the name: however, it only grinned a little wider. "Come, it's pleased so far," thought Alice, and she went on. "Would you tell me, please, which way I ought to go from here?"
"That depends a good deal on where you want to get to," said the Cat.
"I don't much care where---" said Alice.
"Then it doesn't matter which way you go," said the Cat.
"---so long as I get somewhere," Alice added as an explanation.
"Oh, you're sure to do that," said the Cat, "if you only walk long enough."
"But I don't want to go among mad people," Alice remarked.
"Oh, you can't help that," said the Cat: "we're all mad here. I'm mad. You're mad."
"How do you know I'm mad?" said Alice.
"You must be," said the Cat, "or you wouldn't come here."
Alice's Adventures in Wonderland
Lewis Carroll
Now, I bring these 2 quotes up (especially the latter one) to make a singularly crucial point. In a logical view of the world around, that world can only be accepted as such it is with the rules that apply to it. To understand the rules of a closed system is to understand the system itself. Now granted that is easier said than done. The main thing is to remember not to consider a closed system using the rules, or premises if you like, of some other system (i.e. you can't simply make up new rules for a pre-existing system). Such an arrangement will surely lead to dissaster.

Remember that when you're IN Wonderland, you are OF Wonderland. You are subject to its rules for good or ill. Accept the rules, manipulate the rules, fiddle with the rules, bend the rules if you must, but do not disregard them. Take into consideration the guiding forces around you; be mindful. You'll be fine.

Secunda (or prima as pertaining to the initially quoted text), realize, as the cliche holds, your future is your own. You'll get somewhere...eventually. All you have to pick is where. And consider please the possibility that nowhere is, in a sense, somewhere. I will attempt to defend this postulate if need be. If that is indeed the case, then you go somewhere (read nowhere) even while standing still. You see? The possiblilities are endless and negligable all at once.

Life is just a game.
And regardless, "We're all mad here."

Play fair or at least play smart my friends,

torpid tyrant

In this post-Matrix world, I hope we never forget the master of such nonsenselike pseudo-realistic representations, Charles Lutwidge Dodgson.

11:51 PM

(0) comments
Wednesday, November 03, 2004  
All I have to say after over a year of not posting is this... "should my life make me feel like im in Wonderland?" I mean, i look around sometimes and nothing makes a bit of sense. What bugs me even more is that i'm afraid South Park gets more things right than i ever would have expected. Every election is between a "giant douche bag" and a" turd sandwich." Pardon the terminology, but as you can see it's quoted material, more or less. In the end both Bush and Kerry want a larger federal government which is great (unless youre a US citizen). If either major candidate says otherwise, he is lying.

I'll be back soon

Torpid Tyrant

1:41 AM

(0) comments
Friday, July 18, 2003  
back from the grave and mad as i'll get out

where ive been is unimportant. lets get down to business. Do the ends justify the means? Of course they dont. I can describe an almost infinite number of examples of good ends and bad means. wealth is good; robbery is bad. peace is good; slavery is bad. plentiful food is good; cannibalism is bad. charity is good; lying is bad. These pairs of value judgements probably seem logical; the only exception may be the last one.

charity and lying? what could be the connection? well, have you heard about that war in Iraq? even most US citizens have heard of the iraqi war. ends and means... As i drove home from school every day during spring semester, i subjected myself to the fanatic partisan patriotism of Sean Hannity. I was ensconced by a single phrase. Weapons of Mass Destruction, granted this phrase evolved, or mutated, into Weapons of Mass Murder (for a better emotional impact).

I waited patiently and silently as our troops searched, scoured, and interogated. It is now july; they have found nothing of note. if they had, we would know unless bush is holding back so he can play his political enemies for fools. what kills me is that Sean Hannity has the gall to say that this was never just about weapons of mass destruction. he says now that all we wanted to do is free a people. my head is about to explode *wraps head with ducktape*.

1. we were told that iraq was a threat to national security. we were, and are, in the midst of a war on terrorism (impossible but i digress), so we needed to stop iraq from selling all their nukes and bio/chem stuff to terrorists. makes sense, but we havent found jacksquat. either we were way too late or we were wrong or we were lied to for unknown reasons.

2. if this was all about freeing a people, the we were beyond a shadow of doubt lied to and mislead. not only is it not our business to free a people that is not trying to free themselves, but also our president then used america's overwhelming fright to make a friend of the iraqi people. Why? dunno.

just one more comment... realize please that the longer this "war" lasts, the more excuse there is to "protect" us by stealing our freedoms and spying on us. im scared to death and angry, very angry. if any of you who read this would like a word of advice, here it is.

Do NOT personify the fears of the paranoid.

thanks for reading and sorry about the long delay

torpid tyrant

4:11 PM

(0) comments
Wednesday, June 25, 2003  
My view

Ends and means, consequences and actions, where youre going and how you get there.

12:21 AM

(8) comments
Tuesday, June 10, 2003  

Do the ends justify the means? When you want a certain outcome, does the way you get there matter? Give me your opinions. I'll give you mine in a bit.

torpid tyrant

1:35 AM

(0) comments
Thursday, May 15, 2003  
something i've been toying with

looking at the news and listening to radioshows, i see two sides in the media. this situation is quite obvious and is, therefore, not the point of this discussion. Sean Hannity, Bill O'Reilly, and Rush Limbaugh: these men are worth listening to; however, they are dedicated republicans. why is that a bad thing? it's bad because they, consequently, cannot admit that the republican party is as bad as the democrats. both parties suck because they both want complete control of the USA. i do not mean to imply that individuals want such a thing, though some do. what i do mean to imply is this: if these two parties have their way a police state WILL ensue. the republican party would bring fascism and the democratic party would bring socialism. now, according to some people, these two extremes are at opposite ends of a straight line spectrum, but this view is a fallacy. there are no straight lines from here to there in life (sorry to bust your bubble). a more appropriate picture to think of would be a parabola. democracy being at the vertex and fascism and socialism at two corrosponding points on opposite legs of this parabola. in other words they are closer to each other than we like to think. they do not regulate each other. they compliment each other. like two mules in the same yoke, they pull and push from left to right and back again. but, the goal, my friends, is to go forward. forward is the aim and forward is where their power lies, onward and downward.

anyway, what i really wanted to do was ask you all to please notice that as all the republicans blame democrats for the advent of BIG GOVERNMENT, they are simultaneously, in a kind of magician's slight-of-hand, increasing the government's size as well as scope (the US Patriot Act, need i say more). please be watchful, and protect your rights, 'cause no one else will.
thanks for reading,
torpid tyrant

6:49 PM

(0) comments
Wednesday, April 30, 2003  
a bit sappy i know

is this true,

can it really be,

someone else,

who sees what i see.

a counter part,

a missing piece,

two halves of a whole,

may it not cease.


she's more than i could fathom.

i never thought,

that i could find one,

much less that she would find me.



playful insecurity.

will it work?

who are we?

what does she want?

what does she need?

questions that, perhaps,

only time can answer for me.

torpid tyrant

5:39 PM

(0) comments
Monday, April 28, 2003  
a single thought

perhaps love can happen to a nobody.
i suppose it is a possibility. But, one mustn't jump to conclusions. The way back down is sometimes rough; however, also remember that, as the Bible says, "This too shall pass." i suppose life is an okay journey after all.

torpid tyrant

11:17 PM

(0) comments
Thursday, April 24, 2003  
2 days a work in progress...

Have a nice yesterday,

Tomorrow said to thee,

What i am, you will never see,

and what you are, I'll never be.

We're worlds apart,

separated by time,

a constant separation.

Still as night,

aloof to your presence,

I sit.

This night, perhaps, is more than simple simile.

Is it a wall that we climb to see,

How high it is and where we were,

And where---we'll---ne---ver---be.

torpid tyrant

5:18 PM

(0) comments
Where you been? Well...

To be quite honest, i've been around, but i simply have not had much to say. Also, in case you're wondering what happened to the anti-evolution essay, well, i'll tell you. My religion view point, the last installment, was not up to par. i was and am very disappointed in how it turned out; you probably noticed. anyway, i do not feel like writing it over. if any of you would like me to finish the series i will, but i doubt you do.

Well, thats it.
torpid tyrant

5:02 PM

(0) comments
Tuesday, March 25, 2003  
math? --- an interjection
Life is a fractal,
full of repeating shapes,
seen over and over again,
though the picture changes.
torpid tyrant

12:48 AM

(0) comments
Sunday, March 23, 2003  
Religious? The most basic element of every religion is faith. Deny this fact if you will, but you will do so futilely.

For all the arguments in the world, you cannot refute the fact that evolution IS unproven. In the stead of proof, we find acceptance and assuption (you know what they say about assumptions ; ). In any other case, a topic is deemed beyond the realm of science when it cannot be observed. The normal response from a scientist when presented with an outlandish claim should be "I have to see this myself before I will believe you." And, by see, the said scientist should mean i need to see it, test it, study it, and make my own observations, but with evolution, fellow scietists take their colleagues' word as truth. How can this be? i hate to think of the possibilities, so i will leave this question unanswered for you. Normally, questioning of a theory is the key to reliable research. Actually, questioning of a theory IS research. However, on the topic of evolution, when the theory is questioned, science turns defensive. An evolutionist, often, is willing to resort to blows to defend his "scientific" idea. Is it just me or does this behavior sound more like fanatical religion? I do not mean to say that a theory's founder does not or should not try to defend his/her idea. No argument can be one-sided, for either side. There is a give and take to discussions. But when a questionable theory gains faith-based followers in this way, truth is long gone. Of course, when discussing the origin of man, many things are called into question and, perhaps, rightfully so, but it is my OPINION that the origin of man is inherently beyond the realm of science anyway. i say this because if there were any skeletal remains of "transitional" species, there is the possiblility that they are long gone. Maybe the bone structures of trastional forms were unstable inasmuchas the entire being was incapable of long life anyway. Consider the trasition from fish to reptile; going from gills to lungs is a huge step.

On a different note, i would like to mention that few Creationists become evolutionists. i say that to say this. Most evolutionists begin as atheists who cannot explain where we came from. Lacking any better explanation, they cling to evolution and hang on for dear life. One Christian evolutionist friend of mine used the example of evolution in flowers as proof of his belief. He explained that scientists have been able to observe the cross-pollination of these flowers and the apparent evolution of new species. But, my friends, you must realize that the classification system for biology and especially botany is so vague and inconsistant that if you give one plant to 4 different scientists, separately, you should expect to receive 4 different classifications. This fact does not help my friends case too very much, ehh?

As always, please give me some input. Call me an idiot or something. ANYTHING!! i won't stalk you or annoy you about your beliefs. Come on! Open my eyes. What have you got to lose? Don't leave me in the dark.
torpid tyrant

2:29 AM

(0) comments
Wednesday, March 19, 2003  
The war has begun

I am not quite ready for the next installment of evolution? So, i am asking for some unrelated input. Do you think we should be going to war with Iraq? Granted your aswer does not matter a bit, and the question is ubiquitous but i would like to know what you think (assuming someone out there actually reads this site). Send your answers to
thank you for your time
torpid tyrant

8:47 PM

(0) comments
Thursday, March 06, 2003  
what's the deal with evolution?
It's been proven... right? Well, not exactly.

Let me begin by saying that yes, i believe the Christian Bible, and consequently Genesis, based on faith. This basis is acceptable because Christianity, and its holy book, are inherently religious, and faith is, thus, not only acceptable but necessary.

That said, let's begin. The very basic theory of evolution is the common ancestory of all life on earth. There are really four aspects of this esteemed theory about which i wish to write; they are scientific, religious, sociological, and political. i will take them one by one in order to better explain them and to increase the likelyhood that someone will actually read this stuff.

Scientific? In the past hundred years or so, there have been countless "missing links" dug up and held high as trophies by evolutionary scientists and laymen. Sadly, the great majority of these remains are quickly found fraudulent or misclassified. i say most because there are a handful of sites which are still under study. i must also explain the what the remains often, if not always, consist of. In most cases these "scientists" will find a single bone, be it of the jaw, leg, other leg, or chest, and commence classification. They build, or dream up to be more precise, a model of what the animal definitely, absolutely, beyond a shadow of a doubt must have looked like. This, frankly, is absurd. i am quite aware that different animals have certain bone-structures and shapes which may be unique to the species. i am well aware of the patterns which are so very common on earth; however, to say that an animal's entire self may be somehow extrapolated from a single bone would be insulting to Koko (you know, the sign language monkey). I am also aware that speculation is a part of the scientific method (in the form of theories). However, when findings are skewed, twisted, and intentionally misinterpreted and then taught in the entire school system along side the theory of gravity and the laws of thermodynamics, something is badly wrong.

All comments on this series are greatly appreciated, and facts proving me right or wrong are welcome. Bring it!
until next time
this is torpid tyrant saying
good night

6:03 PM

(0) comments
Wednesday, March 05, 2003  
on a lighter note
this sounds about right; though a good friend of mine seems to surpass me in smarts, sometimes. you know who you are.

Which OS are You?
Which OS are You?

1:40 AM

(0) comments
Thursday, February 27, 2003  

---nothing is the same,

life has totally changed,

you left things half done,

but am i the one to blame?

--i cannot fathom your thoughts,

i don't know what you believe,

all left to do is question reality.

--are we really here?

would it matter if we were not?

are actions any different,

any different from thought?

--the world melts around me,

infinity comes naturally,

i can see but cannot be,

you are whole even without "we."

--no doubt you wonder where i am,

why i am not somewhere else,

perhaps you care too little or too much.

--you cannot hide your disinterest,

i can tell you do not care,

but you cannot make me believe if,

you say you will not be there.

--i am stuck and cannot leave,

a smile is all i need,

if only you were me,

you would see

all the nothing and everything i see.

What a world this is.

torpid tyrant

6:44 PM

(0) comments
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